About Loyalty In Love
Loyalty or fidelity means devoted commitment that cannot be broken easily. To be loyal, means to adhere to all the promises made for the lifetime. To keep all the commitments made forever. Loyalty is rather a very easy word but a very laudable quality that is difficult to keep for a lot many people.
Loyalty does not consider change in circumstances. If I am loyal to my partner and my partner meets with an accident that disfigures him/her badly, does not mean that I go away to somebody better looking. If I commit to someone about my relationship and that person goes broke after sometime, does not mean that I will look for richer persons. Every situation that comes tests loyalty. In some countries the law allows you to break your marriage owes if your partner goes lunatic. But many loyal people don’t break the relationship even at that time.
Every relationship rests on trust and truth. If the relationship began with lies, it can never sustain. The foundation is of lies. How truth can grow from the seed of lie? The first need or requirement of going in a long-term relationship is to be truthful in all respects. Fooling others into believing untruths is a sin.
Once you have decided to and committed loyalty, you should never break it under any circumstances. There can be no excuse for that. By doing any such act, we hurt the other partner who believed in us, and we hurt ourselves by becoming an unfaithful and unreliable person. We lose our self-esteem totally after that. Once that happens, the path is only downhill, all the way to hell. Love and loyalty go together.How can we be disloyal in love? That is an impossible thought.
To love and to be loved is a blessing. To break that by being disloyal is sinning against goodness and God. If by any chance one does an act of disloyalty, one must immediately confess and ask for forgiveness. Will the relationship ever remain same after this act of disloyalty? No. Unless one is lucky to have an extra ordinary partner, the relationship will never remain the same. Better to be a loyal and truthful person always.
Why Two People Love Each Other?
Why do two people love each other? Why do we need someone to love? Why cannot we love ourselves and exist alone? And what is that chemistry that a couple loves each other? Why both should love each other, and no body else? Love is truly a mystery.
The first reason is of course the passion one feels for the other. Call it hormones, mind, heart, emotions or whatever, one falls in love with another person and cannot live without him/her. Physical beauty is not the sole criteria in romantic passionate love. A very beautiful girl can passionately fall in love with an ordinary looking man to the surprise of all. There is something more that is yet to be explored. Ask a lover about why he/she loves her beloved and you will never get a logical answer. Love does not measure qualities, nor sets any standards. Love happens.
Sometimes the love arises out of appreciation of qualities of the other. This love is different than romantic love, but can be equally magnetic. You may get attracted to some persons singing so much that you want to be with him/her at all times. It can be any quality, but it is the appreciation of quality that brings forth this love. In this case the love is passionate love with that quality.
In some cases two persons find so many things alike between each other that they believe they are soul mates. Made for each other, these lovers are bound by the common qualities. What ever may be the reason for falling in love, please fall in love because it is incomparable.
Should It Necessarily Get Destroyed?
Recently I saw a post by a man on a forum saying that he was married for twenty-seven years, but still could not stop thinking of his wife all the time. He wanted to be with her and used to think of her even during work. Some people suggested that he should consult a therapist. Can you see the tragic question and the answers?
Here is a man who loves his wife after twenty-seven years. He has heard so much about marital fights and break-ups that he thinks something is seriously wrong with him. It is like saying that I am healthy and do not fall sick at all. Please advise. and some people may say, please go and meet a Doctor immediately to find out why you are not falling sick and please fall sick as early as you can.
We are living in negativism. We are losing our balance of mind and our thinking ability. Why should we make ourselves as a number and wonder if we are not falling the statistical groups and results that predict doom for a marriage after twenty-seven years. The man should be rather delighted and thank God. His wife should feel very lucky and both should begin helping others keep their love alive for a long period. Such a blessing is rare in today’s world. But it is the negative discussion about break-ups and divorces that make a sane person ask such questions.
Not Living By Values May Hurt Love
We profess some values and act against them. I will come to that shortly, but add here that our not living by values may be hurting our love very badly. When we look for answers to our lost love, we must find out if we had violated our values. Let me give you some examples. What are the values you love? Honesty, speaking truth, helping others, understanding others, caring for others, being compassionate and many other values come in the values list of a majority. What about living by these values?
How many of us do not lie? How many of us behave carelessly towards others/ how many of us cheat others for small gains? We are ready to sacrifice most of our values to reach our material goals. We justify all our actions on the way, but deep inside there is no peace or satisfaction in our heart. We know that we are different to what we began with.
Is the same happening with our love relationship? In love, we say- I will care for you. In love we promise total faithfulness. In love, we promise that we will sacrifice our comfort to make our beloved comfortable. In love we promise many things including never hurting our darling.
When it comes to living by these values, we break most of them. We bring down our love to a give and take and justify our wrong actions with every possible argument. But the end result is death of love. After that we blame our darling for breaking love. That is our tragedy.
Mature And Immature Love
Love has many facets. Love is still a mystery and every lover has his/her own story about love. What is mature love and what type is immature/ Let us find out.
In immature love it is said that the person who falls in love has low self-respect. He/she has little self-confidence and finds a lover to see all the qualities that he/she misses in themselves. The person does not love himself/herself, but loves the partner with great fervor. This is called immature love.
Mature love – If a person has very high self-respect and great self-confidence, he/she is supposed to be in mature love. This is called mature love because it is expected that such persons know what they are doing? They know why they love a particular person and what they expect from the love.
In my opinion both these kids of love may fail equally badly or survive against all the odds, because while talking of love, we have to consider the partner also. I may be a very self respecting person and may have fallen in love after lot of deliberation. That does not matter to my partner who may react in different fashion as times passes. My success or failure does not depend only on me, but also my partner.
Love defies all analysis. Why two persons fall in attraction and become inseparable is a mystery. Very contrasting personalities may love each other for all the life and very similar partner may fall out of love in a short time. It is the very nature of love that makes it a subject of so much investigation .
Is Your Partner Your Soul mate?
To be in love is a divine feeling. To love and get love in return is for few lucky souls. If you are one who has found love that is great. Is your partner your soul mate? Your love will one day wither away. The days of bliss that you are enjoying will become a memory and the new realities of future may prove to be not very attractive. But if you are soul mates, you both will be able to enjoy life together for a much longer time.
Before we discuss about what is a mate and what is a soul mate, let me ask you one simple question. Do you have a passion in life- anything that you love doing and enjoy? If yes, does your love partner share that interest? What if he/she does not? Let us talk about that.
After sometime the physical attraction will reduce. The romantic feelings will get battered with time, but your passion for what you enjoy doing will not reduce. If your partner shares the same passion, you will enjoy doing that together, otherwise, you will look for mates with whom you can share your passion and slowly drift away from your partner.
This is not uncommon. Look at most of the wealthy people. Their main passion is to make money and become more powerful. The process of making money thrills them. What of their partners? That is why you will find marriages getting broken rapidly with such groups. Before you decide on a partner, try and get one who shares your passion and who can be your soul mate in true sense. Your relationship will survive much longer.
How To Look Romantic?
Go through your list of celebrities quickly in your mind. Tell me who out of them looks most romantic to you? Who do you think will take your breath away if you are asked to meet them? The looks, the walk, the talk, the body language, and the charisma these make a person romantic. Who do you think will score in all these departments and leave you mesmerized?
You must have seen many movies. You must have seen many movies with special effects. What are these effects for and why are they called special? The special effects are used to create an atmosphere that may look great. You have to do the same to look romantic. Create special effects around you so that the overall effect is smashing.
I pointed out some qualities earlier – the looks, the walk, the talk, the body language, and the charisma. Assess yourself for all of these. Consult experts if required. For charisma, watch some video shots of charismatic people. Observe carefully. Watch the way these people speak, make hand movements, and change eye and facial expressions. This study will be of help to you in changing yourself totally. Practice in front of the mirror. Add special effects to your personality. Let it look artificial to begin with. Slowly they will all look and become genuine.
It is not easy to look romantic, but given proper changes, you can change to one of the most romantic persons walking on the earth. Do you not believe me? Try what I said about special effects and watch the results.
Do You Let Your Partner Know Why You Love Them?
Do you ever tell your partner about the good qualities that they have? Do you tell them why you love them? Do you make them feel good by telling them about why they are so lovely? Do you make them happy by telling them what you like about them? If not, please begin. Bring a fresh air in your relationship and let your partner feel good.
Try telling them few things. They can be – You never make me feel bad. You are made for me and I am made for you. You have a beautiful body. I love your hairstyle. When I look into your eyes, I swoon with ecstasy. I wait to hear your voice. Your choice of words is excellent. I wait to be with you. I enjoy being with you. I wait to fall asleep so that I can meet you again in my dreams. I love you because you are a beautiful human being. You are so intelligent I get floored. I want to be with you all the time. I keep on thinking of you while working. I think of you at all the times. After meeting you, my life has changed. I never dreamt that i would be so lucky to meet somebody so good.
In our relationships, we should always be very liberal with our praise. We should be very stingy with blames and criticism. Any word that can hurt should be avoided. Any word that can make your partner feel good should be repeatedly used. Make your relationship heavenly and not a hell. Let your partner feel why you love them so much and how they are so lovely.